What A Time

There’s pain in my bones
that never leaves me alone.
There’s been hard times
in this body of mine.

There’s been shivers down my spine,
so many good times
drawing laugh lines
on this body of mine.

I have come to surrender
that there is nothing better
then this old body of mine.
Oh what a time. Oh what a time.


You are the loyal kind,
You would love me all your life,
but the kindest thing I could do,
is not let you.

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NaPoWriMo – Day 13 (Spooky)

Today’s National Poetry Writing Month (NaPoWriMo) is: Write a poem about something mysterious and spooky! 

Child

Broken toys
litter the floor,
A young voice
asks for his green dinosaur,
and a child’s pale face peeks through the door,
just like the night before.
Giggling, whispered conversations are overheard in the halls,
and brown crayon drawings cover the walls.
And yet, no child lives here at all.

I wrote this last year for NaPoWriMo, and I thought it worked for this prompt as well. Hoping to write new poems in the coming days, but just been so busy with work and school. My creativity is at an all time low with all the stress!

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NaPoWriMo – Day 12 (Dull Object)

Today’s National Poetry Writing Month (NaPoWriMo) prompt is: Write a poem about a dull thing that you own, and why (and how) you love it. Alternatively, what would it mean to you to give away or destroy a significant object? So, this prompt reminded me of a poem I wrote a long time ago about sunflowers, and then I could think of nothing else so posting it for this prompt!

Sunflowers

All I wanted were sunflowers to wake up to.
Yellow the color of happiness
and the way I felt about you.
You took that for being a fool.
And instead, you walked away.
Left me in the dark afraid.
I was ready to cry, ready to fight, ready to give up inside.
But instead, I lied, I lied, I lied and said baby, it’s alright.

I thought happiness had to come at a cost.
To gain, you had to take one hell of a loss.
So I took the pain like a martyr.
I suffered to love you.

I would have spent a lifetime.
Right by your side.
But you kept on moving out of my sight.
And I was too nice to let go.
But now I know,
Two lovers can grow apart,
Wild and free
And there is beauty in the truth that you don’t love  me.

I thought happiness had to come at a cost.
To gain, you had to take one hell of a loss.
So I took the pain like a martyr.
I suffered to love you.

All I wanted were sunflowers to wake up to.
Yellow the color of happiness
and the way I felt about you.
To light up our dark and lonely rooms.
But you refused, refused, refused
Eager to see me lose
The smile across my face
Keeping us trapped in this dying, unhappy place.
But I found a way to fight, I found a way to hide
all that I ever wanted
I left it  behind.

I thought happiness had to come at a cost.
To gain, you had to take one hell of a loss.
So I took the pain like a martyr.
I suffered to love you.
All I ever wanted were sunflowers to wake up to.
Yellow the color of happiness
and the way I felt about you.

But all I ever wanted,
I suffered to leave it behind.

mike-marrah-1319345-unsplashPhoto by Mike Marrah on Unsplash

NaPoWriMo – Day 11 (Origin)

Today’s National Poetry Writing Month (NaPoWriMo) prompt is: Write a poem of origin.

My strength
is from
years of
weakness.

So, I am totally bummed I missed the start of NaPoWriMo! I had so much fun participating in it in full last year, but got waylaid this year. Better late than never though!

I had lots of ideas for the prompt today, but alas time is limited. I jotted down the quick line now, but I have some notes started for a different, longer poem that I hope to flush out later.

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Give You Love

I know you’re tired,

I know you’re weak,

It’s been a long day,

You don’t need to pretend with me.

I’ll use my words,

to help heal your hurt.

I’ll be your hope,

when your in despair.

When you can’t catch your breath,

I’ll be your air.

When you want to give up,

I’ll give you love,

I’ll give you love,

until your strong enough.

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In the Woods

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In the woods,
I feel your presence,
in the silence,
of my mind.
The wind blows me kisses,
the trees rustle in its wake,
and I ache, to sway along with life again.
The warmth of the sun,
brings me alive, just enough
to know I’ve gone blind.
This Earth bears life,
and maybe now it is the only witness to mine.
So, I carve into all the trees,
how you were loved by me.

 

 

Scraps of Stuff (Part 2)

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Words

I scour your words,
until they hurt,
I undisguise,
your lies.

Taking Stock

It’s time,
I take stock,
of this life of mine.

Have I taken more than what I’ve put in?
If there is a fight, would my goodness win?

I’ve lied, I’ve cheated, I’ve crossed so many lines,
I’ve hurt people I love,
and I don’t know if I’ve done enough to make it up.

I sold my life short,
sitting out,
regretting now,
how I didn’t always take my turn,
there’s so much more I could’ve learned.

I’ve made so many mistakes,
even when I knew the stakes.

I didn’t always act my best,
wedging my bets against the rest,
for my own glory,
feeling poorly.
I acted unkind,
I broke hearts,
just to save mine,
I wasted so much time,
on the wrong side.

But maybe loving you is my saving grace,
my chance at the better place,
pure and pristine,
it washes me clean.

Patience

Sometimes, I feel like my body,
is unfolding unto itself,
until all that is left,
is peeled skin,
wearing thin.

Pain

My pain is wearing thin,
leaving space for you to come back in.

Ponderings

So even though I haven’t posted in awhile, I have been jotting down some things on my phone to post later. So here is a jumble of random, unfinished ponderings I may or may not revisit later. Honestly, weird stuff just pops into my head sometimes, but just plopping it all down here.

Your doubts,
build a tower,
over your thoughts,
maybe it’s better to build a box.

Don’t stop here,
My weary dear.
Hang hope on who you want to be.
Your strength will keep.

Take the leap.
Take the leap.


Kill your darlings and the cats,
Throw the baby with the bath,
stretch, stretch the facts.


We are getting older,
we are getting wiser,
maybe we know better,
maybe you regret her.

I still love you laying here in the dark,
but I am waiting, I am waiting,
for that spark.


Hope is a rope,
I tie around my neck,
just for the heck of it.


I am getting older,
but I still don’t know a thing,
I’ve lived my biggest dreams,
but I always pull at the seams,
until it all falls apart on me.
I cannot seem to find serenity.


The leaves shaking, waving,
like rain coming down in sheets,
the space of serenity,
you and me between the trees.


There is no one around,
in this ghost town,
and it’s a lonely place to be,
with just my thoughts and me.

 

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